If you only knew me
by LoonyLoopyLala
Summary: Merlin reveals his magic to Arthur. One-shot.


**My first Merlin story! I do not own Merlin.**

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"Anything else Sire?" Merlin asked before leaving Arthur's chambers. The king looked at him a moment.

"That will be all. You may go." Merlin smiled and turned to open the door. Before reaching it, however, he turned back around. Arthur looked up from his table. "I said you could go. I'm busy."

"I was wondering if I could confide in you with something. It's important."

Arthur feigned a look of surprise. "You've been keeping a secret? An important one?" He said sarcastically. "Fine then." He leaned back in his chair.

Merlin took a deep breath and walked across the room. he stopped in front of Arthur. His eyes flashed gold and a small flame appeared in his palm. He held it out for Arthur to see.

"Whats that?" The King asked, his voice calm. Merlin looked him in the eye.

"Magic." He replied simply. "I'm a sorcerer."

"A sorcerer?" Arthur asked in disbelief. Merlin extinguished the flame.

"Yes Sire."

Arthur stared at the spot where the flame had been. When he spoke, his voice was unusually calm. "How long have you had this... This _power_?"

Merlin cast his eyes downward, avoiding the King's gaze. "Since I was born." He mumbled.

"Since you were born." The King repeated, his quiet voice brimming with anger. "And when exactly where you planning on telling me?" Merlin could hear an edge of sadness

in his voice and flinched slightly. He would almost prefer for Arthur to be yelling at him.

"I couldn't under Uther's rule. I would have been signing my own death warrant." He replied, his eyes and voice cold.

"And you expect me to do _what_ exactly?" Arthur burst out, startling Merlin. His eyes flashed gold and the bed curtains fell down. "Do you expect me to lift the ban for you? You're just a servant, and not a very good one at that!" He yelled, now out of his seat and standing over the sorcerer.

"You're a better king than your father, Arthur." Merlin replied, his voice full of fury. "You know what is right. Just-" His voice faltered. "Just don't make me leave. Camelot is my home."

Arthur stared at him, thinking, his eyes unreadable.

"You know perfectly well about the ban. I have no choice. Magic is, and always will be, evil."

"But it can be used for good!" Merlin burst out.

"Prove it then." Arthur hissed through clenched teeth.

"Fine." Merlin spat back. "I have saved your life countless times. I tried to save Uther but Morgana was working against me with her magic."

"How _exactly_ am I to know you aren't working with Morgana."

"Why would I be? She wants you dead and Camelot under her rule. I've been keeping you alive all these years!" Merlin responded defensively.

"Fine." Arthur said shortly. "Are you hiding anything else?" He spat out.

"I'm a Dragon Lord, the last Dragon Lord. I control the Great Dragon, Killagrah, as well as the White Dragon, Aithusa. I take the disguise Dragoon the Great. I have never, nor will I ever, work with Morgana. Only Gaius and my mother know of my powers." He finished and looked up to find the King staring out the window.

"Sire?" Merlin asked tentatively after a few moments of silence.

"Leave my chambers. Now." Arthur said quietly. Merlin nodded and left the room.

The next morning, Merlin went about his duties as usual. Entering the King's chambers, he called out his usual greeting. "Good morning Si-" He stopped mid-sentence as he glanced up and saw Arthur sitting at his table, already dressed. "You're up early." He remarked while setting out breakfast.

"I've been thinking about our... Discussion yesterday."

Merlin paused, nervous. He finished setting the table and looked up to find Arthur studying him, his face unreadable. "Do it again." He commanded.

Merlin's brows knitted together in confusion. "Do what again?" He asked timidly, though he already suspected he knew the answer.

"That spell. The flame." Arthur's voice confirmed Merlin's thoughts.

His eyes flashed gold as a flame appeared again in his palm. Arthur stood up and walked closer, studying the flame and Merlin.

"Put it out." He commanded. Merlin murmured a word and the flame extinguished, as quick as it had appeared. Arthur sat back down.

"Merlin." He started slowly. "The law is the law. As King, I must obey it." He took a deep breath and looked Merlin in the eyes. "You are banned from Camelot. You have until noon tomorrow to leave. If you return, I will have you killed." He sighed. "Good bye Merlin."

Merlin ignored Gaius and slumped onto his bed, head in hands, and started to cry. A moment later, he felt Gaius' hand rubbing comforting circles on his back.

"Merlin? What is it my boy?" Merlin wiped his eyes.

"I told Arthur. About my magic." He chocked out. "I thought I could trust him. He banished me Gaius. I have until tomorrow to leave." Gaius pulled him into a hug. "He'll kill me if I return." Merlin finished, crying harder now. Saying it out loud made it real and final. Not just some nightmare he could wake up from.

He stood up suddenly, pulled his bag out from under his bed and started packing.

"Where will you go?" Gaius asked, watching him dart around the small room.

Merlin paused, thinking.

"Ealdor. With my mother. Or I'll travel around. I can find something, you know me Gaius."

Gaius stood up and pulled Merlin into a hug.

"Good luck. I'll miss you, my dear boy." Merlin felt fresh tears run down his cheeks.

"I'll miss you too Gaius."

Merlin quietly slipped out of the door before dawn, careful not to wake Gaius. Bag slung over his shoulder, he approached the front gate. Two guards watched him carefully as he turned back to look at the castle one last time. Blinking back tears, he walked through the gate and the lower town, thankfully not running into any one he knew. Before long, Merlin had lost sight of the Castle and was alone on the road to Ealdor.

Night fell. Seeing no town nearby, Merlin set up a small camp in the cover of the trees. He had a restless nights sleep and awoke even more tired than the day before.

He packed his bag using magic and set off quickly.

Around midday, Merlin heard a horse approaching and turned to see the familiar red of a Knight's cloak.

"Merlin?" Arthur's voice called out. Merlin turned back around and kept walking. Arthur dismounted and ran to catch up to the sorcerer. "Merlin. Wait." He reached out and grabbed Merlin's shoulder. Merlin shrugged him off and quickened his pace. Persistent, Arthur tried again. Merlin's eyes flashed gold as he felt Arthur's hand again. He heard a hiss of pain as the King was burned.

"What do you want?" Merlin spat out angrily.

"For you to come back. I was wrong to banish you." Arthur replied apologetically.

"Please Merlin."

"And why should I? I'll just have to hid who I am again." He glared at the King.

"I'm lifting the ban on magic."

Merlin was caught off guard, and a small smile appeared on his lips.

"You're lifting the ban?" He repeated, not believing his ears.

"I'm lifting the ban for you Merlin." Arthur confirmed, smiling.

"But why?" Merlin asked, confused. "Why for me?"

"Because you showed me that not all magic is bad." Arthur explained. "Also, you're my best friend. I realized I couldn't bear to lose you. You're a rubbish servant but a loyal friend." He smiled warmly at Merlin. "And- Thank you." He pulled Merlin into a hug. Merlin grinned and hugged him back. "Tell no-one about this." Arthur muttered into Merlin's ear.

They broke apart and Merlin grinned at Arthur, his whole face shining.

"Thank you Arthur."


End file.
